Talk:Lailee Bakhtiar
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Article critiques
[edit]Rewrite? Infobox? Awkwardly worded marriage declaration?
Why does the article start with "latest poetry book" in the first sentence of the main article? Shouldn't biographies start with birth and childhood? The article reads as more of a puff piece you would find in a magazine than an encyclopedic article. The start of the article is all about books, work, awards.
Picture and infobox is pretty standard in biographies of people, why is it missing in this article?
"Married in 1974 to tennis pro and Davis Cup player Erik van Dillen (and a sister of tennis pro Fred McNair[4])" Why is this phrase in parentheses? The way it's worded it implies that Erick van Dillen is female and her aunt or that she married two people.
I never heard of her before and have nothing against her (and will probably never revisit the article) but this article needs a lot of work! 184.96.201.93 (talk) 11:59, 5 February 2019 (UTC)